Mother's Day! Mmhmm.
Once upon a time I looked forward to being included in the celebration.
Then came years of trying to get pregnant without help and with help. Realizing we weren't going to get pregnant without SERIOUS help (if at all). Those were the days I noticed that babies were no longer drawn to me but withdrew when I approached. (Or maybe I just felt sorry for myself!)
In that era, I was not so keen on Mother's Day. Sorry Mom. But it kind of became all about me, and not deserving the rose they gave to mothers as they walked into church or brunch! Hated it, actually. I still feel quite conflicted for those who hurt on this day because they have never become mothers.
Now... we have one adult daughter we consider our own, but who has LOTS of moms who love her and three adopted darlings with varying degrees of birthmom loyalty and conflicted feelings about me. Mother's Day takes on a whole new meaning. Aside from helping them process and grieve in healthy ways, I have one other big responsibility.
It is the day I have to celebrate myself! I am a Mother (whether they want me or not)!
My husband and I have taken to making sure we each get some of what we need on Mother's/Father's day. Which usually adds up to time!
We celebrate our Mom's ON the day, and around it we care for each other and ourselves.
This road is tiring and can be pretty rough sometimes. But as a very wise lady said to me recently, "That can be very redemptive work, if you keep a right heart." So my prayer for all the trauma moms I know is that they keep a right heart. This involves lots of things, mostly from God. It also requires that we are disciplined in caring for ourselves by taking the time to allow our spirits to be refreshed!
Care for yourself by allowing space for peace and love to flow in from the source!
Happy Mother's Day!